So the neurofeedback didn't work any magic this time. Culley came off the school bus grumpily demanding to be carried home, while looking down at his feet. Not a good sign. The irritability and nidging continued for the rest of the night. So, I decided to take matters into my own hands. The next morning, he woke up and came into our bed unusually early (neurofeedback can mess with their sleep) maybe because he has a cold. He took my hand and said "C'mon Mama, let's go". That is a good sign... Culley is in the building. So I dragged myself out of bed and followed him to his room where he started playing with his cars while standing on his head - that's not a good sign...Culley is trying to leave the building. I immediately got down on the floor and asked him if I could play. He sat up happily and replied "yes" and handed me a car. For the next 20 minutes I kept him engaged by coming up with all sorts of play scenarios. When Finn woke up he came in and joined the play. Yes, this was all before 7am and without any coffee on board! Go Mom!
This is how the morning went. I put in a lot of effort keeping the daily routine going (eating breakfast, getting dressed, etc...) while interjecting play that was stimulating and appealing to Culley. I could start the play and be really engaged and eventually Finn would join in and they would take over. Then I was free to make breakfast (and coffee!), pack lunches, and get dressed myself. Basically - no downtime for him to withdraw. There were a couple times when I heard the dreaded monotone verbalizing start, indicating he was going to the dark side. I immediately stopped what I was doing, got down and looked him in the eye and asked him to stop. Then redirected him to a sensory activity disguised as a job, "Can you bounce this ball down the hall and help me feed Drake?" It worked like a charm! I felt so proud of myself for finding a way to keep Culley in the real world if only for one morning.
Previously, I allowed him to go into the zone and make his noises as long as he wasn't hurting or bothering anyone. However, it seems that once he's in "the zone" he can't stop himself from making bad decisions about what is appropriate contact. Maybe if I can keep him out of the zone, by not allowing him to make the noises and redirecting him, he'll stop wanting to be there so much.
According to brain science research (The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science (Null) by Norman Doidge) , the more a person links certain thoughts with certain actions (feeling stress and smoking a cigarette, for instance) the stronger the neuron connections become, making it harder and harder to stop the connection. For Culley, he must be having a thought or feeling that causes him to want to leave reality. If he continually does just that in response to the thought or feeling, then it becomes automatic and a much harder cycle to break. However, if I can help redirect him when he's feeling that way, then perhaps we can weaken or even break that connection!
Hey, at least it makes me feel like I'm doing something to help him.
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